Okay, it’s me, Lindsey again. Here with the “RV Weekly Bark Report” you’ve all been waiting for.  This week’s topic really curls my tail . . . Oh, I don’t have one!  Well, it really curls my big ears: can’t we control dog shedding?

Dad calls me a hair bag all the time!  He says there is too much Corgi hair in MY RV.  Might I just add that I’ve licked plenty of human hair off the floor, and floaters out of my water bowl.  Do you hear me complaining?  What’s the big deal?  The big AC unit blows and the hair goes airborne.  It’s a great game to try to catch it before it hits the floor.  I don’t understand!  This is really fun!  They should try it.  Control dog shedding . . . not while this Corgi lives here!!

Weekly Bark Report

I know all my fellow doggie RVers have been waiting patiently to see what new insight I might have for them on how to deal with their human Show-fers. (I don’t have dew claws so it’s really hard for me to check a dictionary)

They get to drive me all over the country while I write messages on the windows with my nose.  I pay them back for their services by letting Mom and Dad live in MY RV and sleep in my queen size bed.  I get the middle and they have to sleep on either side.

Y’ all do know what RV really stands for right?  Rover’s Vehicle!  Like my accent?  After 7 years in Florida, I’m trying to fit in.  Bark y’ all, bark y’ all.

Control Dog Shedding

Anyway, mom gets this great idea to get a new brush to control dog shedding.  They babysat a 7-month-old Corgi that had come with all kinds of stuff, and a different kind of dog hair brush. How dare the little brat invade my RV!  They didn’t ask me if I wanted a visitor!

Anyway, Mom fell in love with this brush that Rylee had.  Mom thought it worked really well to control dog shedding!  So I’m thinking, gee, thanks Rylee.

The thing is called the Shed Monster.  It’s really not a monster.  Not scary at all compared to that other brush Mom had.  I tried to bury it in an army-dillo hole but mom caught me.  You know those funny looking things with the hard shell and long pointy nose?

I actually think this shed monster brush feels pretty good.  It gets all my nasty undercoat out.  The other brush really tugged and pulled and scratched me.  I’m all for a good back scratch, but that one was like spikes. Owooooooo!

Worst part about this whole deal is she takes me outside on a picnic table to embarrass me!  Imagine, my stub hanging out for all to see.  Gee willies.  I can hear all my fellow RVer dogs howling with laughter at me watching this torture.  Keep it up doggies, your humans may do this to you someday too. Then watch this Corgi have a really good laugh.

Later, it’s fun watching the birds from my RV window picking up all my hair she brushed on the ground. The birds take it to make a bed for their babies. Dad says it’ll make a stinky bed.  Hhhmmm.  The birds don’t seem to mind. They even fight over it sometimes.

Sometimes before enduring this brushing to control dog shedding, I have to get a bath!  So, before the little shed monster strikes I see towels pulled out and then I know that the ritual baptism is coming.

I think I smell really good.  Dad says I smell like an a$$ because I lick my butt!  He’s just jealous!

Mom has this stuff she rubs all over me during this baptism. She calls it Tropiclean Shampoo.  More like Tropi-smelly to my nose.  Mom loves to snuggle with me afterwards cuz she says I smell so good.  Have you ever smelled a wet dog?   I guess Mom has no sense of smell.  Whatever!  The things a cute Corgi has to endure!!  I get even though.  Neither of us comes out of that ordeal dry.

Okay, gotta go.  Here comes Mom shaking her finger at me. Uh Oh . . . caught in the act using the computer again.  I’ll bark at y’ all again!

Mom here!  Okay, Lindsey had her fun and we are going to let this one fly as I know Lindsey really wants to share her views on the internet.  We hope some of her tail-wagging friends will comment back because Lindsey really wants some canine companionship while on the road in OUR RV!

So dogs, bark away!  Get your Mom and Dad to share your thoughts with Lindsey!